Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Dear Birthmother...

Dear Birth Mom:

As we write this letter, we are praying for peace, comfort, and wellness for you and your family. We would like to take this opportunity to remind you of God’s tender heart for you and your baby. Thank you for giving your child the gift of life. It is with deep admiration also that we recognize your decision to give her yet another precious gift: the gift of a family who will love and care for her. Your decision in choosing adoption, takes tremendous courage, trust, and, most of all, love. We believe that God has a plan for you both even now, when things may be uncertain or difficult. We know that the Lord is present in all of our lives and that it is His work that has brought us to you and your precious baby’s life.

We are Agnes and Edward, and we live in a quiet Los Angeles suburb. Edward is 38 years old and is an information technologist and has diligently worked on the faculty of a southern California university for 15 years. I, Agnes, am 33 and a pediatric physical therapist. I have a master’s degree in physical therapy and have been practicing for 9 years. Seven years ago, because of the love of working with children, I decided to specialize in pediatrics. I have enjoyed these years of being able to care for families and children with special needs, including physical and developmental disabilities. Although these are our career paths and what we do “professionally,” our deepest desire is for God’s blessing of a child, to share our love and our home. More than anything else, we want to make parenting our greatest priority and number-one job.

Edward and I met in college in1994 and soon became college sweethearts. According to Edward, he was attracted to my enthusiasm and sense of humor. He claims to have fallen in love at first sight. Soon after we met, I fell deeply in love with Edward’s quiet confidence and gentleness. In August of 2000, Edward proposed under a pale moon and bright stars, while we strolled on the beach. We were married in Malibu, CA, in May of 2002.

We are blessed to have a beautiful marriage and a home. We moved away from the city life and into a home in a quiet suburban neighborhood, with the thought that we would soon start a family. Edward was ready to be a loving father, and I was ecstatic at the possibility of nurturing and rearing children. In late 2002, we found out we were pregnant, but the pregnancy quickly resulted in a miscarriage. We were heartbroken by this trial. However, it was this year that we looked steadfastly to God for guidance. We found comfort and peace in His promise of specific plans for us. We continued to pray for a miracle. In 2004, we conceived once more, but it resulted in an ectopic pregnancy. The doctors didn’t have answers as to why this happened. We prayed about this and looked to the Lord once more for guidance. As a couple, we felt at this moment the call to adopt. We believe that the trials of losing our children have strengthened us as a couple and truly made us realize how much we wanted to be parents. It mattered not whether we conceived a child biologically or just in our hearts.
Our neighborhood consists mostly of young families with small children. It is located within a mile from parks, safe walking trails, and distinguished elementary and high schools. We have been truly blessed to reside in an area that would be beneficial to a growing and developing child. We both enjoy traveling and have been blessed with the experiences of other countries and cultures. But we would consider it the ultimate blessing to finally bring a child into our lives to share our love and our home with.

We have our immediate family living close to us. We often have nephews and nieces visiting us from various cities here in California and also from Arizona. Edward and I were born in the Philippines and raised there until our families immigrated to the United States in our pre-adolescent years. Between our families, we speak three Filipino dialects (Ilokano, Tagalog, and Cebuano). As you can imagine, our family gatherings are a cultural food fest of pancit, lumpias, and chicken adobo . . . along with loads of laughter and chatter. We’ve assimilated into the Western culture but continue to take pride in our Filipino heritage, values, and traditions.

We plan to raise your child with the support of our family, our friends, and our church. You will never have to wonder whether she is loved and cared for. She will grow up knowing about God’s love and promises. She will always know about you and your decision of deep love to place her for adoption. We will tell her about her mother’s strong and courageous character. We will tell her of your bravery and your testimony. Most of all, we will tell her stories of your unconditional love and that the greatest gift of all came from you: her life.

We promise to continue to pray for you, that you will know God’s plan for you in His perfect timing.

In Christ’s enduring love,

Agnes & Edward


  1. What a beautiful testimony of love to your family - all of your family. What an amazing and deeply personal gift to your daughter and her birthmother.

  2. Thanks Jen!!! It really is...I'm so thankful!

  3. Amen (tear-eyed and deeply touched). I feel the same, I just don't know mine yet. ;)

  4. I am forever grateful to her birthmother. Without her, I would not have this blessing...my daughter. These women need to be honored for choosing adoption and entrusting their precious children to us.